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Saturday, February 11, 2017

Maureen Dowd, "Trump’s Gold Lining": Sales of Female Pelvic Protectors Skyrocket

In her latest New York Times op-ed entitled "Trump’s Gold Lining," Maureen Dowd informs us that Donald's election has reinvigorated the Times's circulation stats:

"Every time our daft new president tweets about the 'failing' New York Times, our digital subscriptions and stock price jump, driven by readers eager for help negotiating the disorienting Trumpeana Oceana Upside Down dimension rife with gaslighting, trolling, leaking, lying and conflicts."

Well, the Times is not alone in reaping the economic benefits of the Trump presidency. My understanding is that sales of pelvic protectors for female genitalia are going through the roof among women visiting the White House, given Trump's leaked "grab them by the pussy" declaration.

Will federal taxes on profits from the sale of female pelvic protectors make a dent in America's $20 trillion debt, i.e. some $808,000 per family, thereby making America great again?

Will America devolve into a dystopian Clock Work Orange society in which pelvic protectors are de rigueur?

Back to my dogs, who are impatiently waiting for a walk.

1 comment:

  1. While you're on the subject, I thought about selling 'Make America Spell Correctly Again' T-Shirts and pink pussy woollies at the next anti-Trump demonstration.