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Wednesday, July 8, 2015

The Reason Iranian Foreign Minister Javad Zarif Shouted, "Never Threaten an Iranian": You Will Never Guess Why!

Iranian Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif has been having no small number of emotional outbursts in Vienna of late. He is already known to have screamed at John ("Assad is my dear friend") Kerry during a one-on-one meeting, but more recently, on Monday evening, he vented his spleen on poor EU foreign policy head Federica Mogherini and shouted:

"Never threaten an Iranian!"

Now you might think that this outburst was intended for consumption by hometown admirers of this rowdy man of action, and in part this is true; however, there is more to the story. According to my sources at Zarif's hotel, on Sunday night the head of the Iranian delegation to the talks with the P5+1 watched the movie "The Princess Bride" alone in his room. A member of the security detail posted outside his hotel room door informed me that Zarif turned up the volume to a deafening level just before the character Vizinni informed the Dread Pirate Roberts:

"Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!"

This was followed by orgasmic moaning and an eerie silence.

Just thought you might like to know.

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